** Sometime between 2006 - 2007**

Mintaka,


Sleep was an elusive factor last night .. As usual ...

When will I be able to drive the 'ghosts' away !!!

And as usual when this happens, I drove off in the morning .... Had intended to go to my favorite haunt in the Palm Beach Road in Belapur. But somehow ended up in the Borivli National Park. Its a reserved sanctuary, very densely populated with trees. I was telling you about this place yesterday night .... "waha pe leopard milte hain" .. Remember? This place is another of my favored places where I just sit down and think or sometimes take a walk up the desolate path meandering in between the trees ... Na, don’t worry, the 'big cats' won't get hold of me ... I carry more 'poison' than them ...

Whenever 'life' itself seems a little too heavy, I take a walk in this desolated stretch of greenery. Trust me, there is nothing as fulfilling as walking such.

And do it alone if possible. If there is someone along with you then you become obligated to talk with that person, listen to that person and entertain him / her. You would not be able to savor the beauty of nature unless you are alone.

Remember that nature is the only friend who would never ever ask you for anything in return for the things that she gives you aplenty. And that is the only reason that I too, whenever I get the time, go and spend some time alone in the Borivili National Park or the Arrey Colony. The perfect balm to a tired and wounded mind.

If on an evening when all around you is golden in the setting light, you take a walk along the tiny trails of the Borivli National Park right before the turn for the Kanheri Caves, you will find that the trail meanders into the deep forest. The tender touch of the setting sun has lightly touched the green all around. Deep forest. Broken by intermittent strands of 'clearings' caused by the felling of trees. And through these clearings if you look up, you can see the land slowly climbing up to the hill that houses the leopards and some tribal villages.

If you look around you carefully you will find some more dusty trails which seem to vanish suddenly like the stray thoughts of a senile old man .....

Your solitude would be suddenly broken by the cedantic advent of a tribal woman scarfed in red with a basket full of wares to sell in the local market ... or the surprisingly determined steps of an old man with an axe in his hand as if he wants to cut and tear apart everything that is new and young ... his way of protesting against advancement ....

So many thoughts would suddenly cram into your mind .. and vanish suddenly ... to be replaced with another set .... You would be reflecting on so many memories that had warmed your heart, angered you, landed you into trouble, ended up tearing you into pieces .. and even the fondest memories of childhood when you had been up to some mischief and looked at your dad with guilt writ large on your face ... and your dad had smiled indulgently and forgiven you .... All these thoughts would rush into your head ... and surprisingly leave you fresh ... Surprising but true ... Trust me, I know ...

And while walking on the eastern direction for around 15 minutes you would suddenly find yourself atop a small hillock .. And your whole existence would be filled with dread and gloom ... I have named this hillock the "Land of Tears" ... If you reflect deeply, you will realize that in each and every of us lie a "Land of Tears" ... where there is only gloom, desperation, agony, angst and pain ... where very existence becomes a liability .... and you feel like blowing 'life' away in one go .. akin to the sudden gust of wind that blows out the last 'dia' that is burning near your main door ..

But wait ......

Take a few more steps, cross the "Land of Tears" .... and you would come across a stretch of land which is the so lush green that you have never seen such a spectacle in your whole life ... a stretch where it is flowers galore ... wild unseen flowers, vibrant .... intermingled with patches of plantation that the locals have managed ... painting a picture for you so rich in texture that you have never ever experienced hitherto ... a picture that makes you want to live .... makes you feel strong enough to overcome all adversity in life .... makes you feel like sheltering the 'dia' (that I talked about in the last paragraph) and ensuring that the slightest un-bridled wind not touch it ... makes you feel like standing up tall and breathing with gusto the air all around ... as if it is the elixir of life ... makes you want to live ... and let live.

Now here is the paradox. It is at times like these that you would actually yearn for someone's company ... Trust me ... a stray unknown unseen bird would suddenly flutter out of nowhere and sit impatiently on one of the flower stalks and look at you .. those fast darting looks ... as if to ask you why you have come alone .. And then suddenly would flutter away, striking its tiny wings in a flurry ... And your need for solitude would vanish along with it ..

You would desperately yearn for his company, assuming again its a 'he' :-) ... he with his strong determined stride would be complementing your soft and measured walks ... You with the customary softness of a female would be striving for his more masculine existence .... Your impatient eyes akin to that of a scarlet minivet (only if you go in the rainy season though) would try to find out his thoughts ... But trust me, you wouldn't talk .. neither would he ... And despite the fact that you two would be all alone, you would not want any physical intimacy between the both of you at that instant ... you would be savoring the emotional quotient more ... You would just be filled with a warm feeling that this is the 'man' you have chosen to spend your life with ...and that you are not alone .... you would have a subtle feeling that had you married someone else, you would have missed the boat ...

You would feel like the queen of the wilderness and he, your able and attentive student .. you would want to show him the various nooks and corners that you have discovered in your earlier exploits ... you would want to show him the tiny tadpoles that dart around in the crystal clear water of the tiny brook that tears the National Park in two .. you would want to show him the tree in which you had seen the huge beehive the last time you had been around .. you would want to make him hear the gurgling sound of the water as it takes a sharp bend in its course ...

Life would be one fantastic journey .....

Try it ....

More often than not, I am able to discern a sad note around you ... I know its tough staying alone ... No one knows it more than me ... But don’t feel sad re .... There's so much to live for .... so much to cherish ... so much to learn .. so much to admire .... so much to traverse ...

As for me, the journey continues ... as ever ....